Feeling Stronger…

So… After hours of saying no, my mates persuaded me to DJ at the launch of my club night on Saturday, and they were right. It was the right thing to do.

It was a sell out, and as the crowd swelled to about two hundred, I came out of my shell, and played a great set. The floor never cleared and by midnight, I was jumping and dancing and I forgot my troubles. It was an odd night, as another ex (I lived with Fiona for years) turned up, not knowing I’d be there, and there were even some early signs of maybe getting close to someone new. I’m feeling guarded, but that night of fun has helped me no end. I’m sleeping better, my focus is coming back and I’m beginning to feel like myself again… But… Playing at that gig meant drinking, but d’you know what? In the clear light of day, I think I need to be feeling better to achieve anything, so a bad week of eating, might just help the bigger picture.

So. I’ve been fairly good today, even with a six syn Nando’s with my Son, and I am feeling stronger everyday. Friday night was a real low point that won’t be repeated. I haven’t really thought about Sasha since Saturday morning, so I’m thinking that taking a risk, listening to your friends and getting out to live your life and working hard, is the best possible therapy for a broken heart. I think I still need to discuss her in a future post, but I’m going to try and concentrate on talking more about getting lighter, and less about getting over…

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